Davonne Parks

Your Role At Home Is Valuable

How to Make Sure This Season’s Gifts Don’t Become Next Season’s Clutter

{Friends, I prefer to savor Thanksgiving dinner before thinking about Christmas gifts. But, I know many of you like to prepare early for various reasons. So, don’t rush Thanksgiving. But, do read the following article about how to purchase clutter-free gifts before you shop for any more presents!}

I remember laying awake on Christmas Eve, snug under my covers, eagerly anticipating. Finally, I heard the noise. The door to my bedroom creaked open. There was soft tip-toeing. And then, a heaviness near my feet as it was placed on the end of my bed.

As soon as the door latched closed and the footsteps faded away, I quietly pulled the item next to me so I could reach in. My heart thumped as I silently felt around in the dark. I wrapped my small hand around a little cardboard box. I could hear pieces inside as I delicately shook. Definitely a puzzle.

A plastic package that squished. Underwear. At least they were in my room and not under the tree – I could hide them in the morning before my brothers saw.

Small plastic bottles – I knew those were travel soaps and shampoos. Then the box of storybook life savers. Yum! A few things I couldn’t identify in the dark. And finally, the familiar feeling of the orange in the toe.

Satisfied, I gently laid my stocking at the foot of my bed and tucked myself back in. I closed my eyes, lids heavy, and the whole world faded out as sleep finally came.

As a girl, stockings were one of my favorite parts of Christmas. I loved the comfort in knowing that, without fail, my door would creak open and the stocking would be carefully placed at the foot of my bed.

And perhaps the reason most of us love tradition so much is because of the memories attached.

Gifts were placed under the tree with care. Our favorite comfort foods were anticipated for weeks in advance. And now, we want to pass on those same traditions and warm memories. So we shop. We buy. We wrap. And we shop, buy and wrap some more.

But before any of us purchase one more holiday gift, let’s think ahead. Once the packaged are unwrapped, what is going to happen to the gifts? How are we going to feel?

Will we feel satisfied, knowing that we blessed the recipient? Or will we feel guilt and frustration when we’re still making credit card payments on gifts that have already been tossed into a clutter pile and forgotten?

As we shop for the perfect present, here are a few things to keep in mind to help us make sure this season’s gifts don’t become next season’s clutter:

1) Make sure there’s room for the gift.

If the craft shelf and Lego bin are full, then any new craft supplies or Lego’s are practically guaranteed to become clutter. To minimize the mess, clear out a little space before Christmas or consider giving an experience gift such as a family trip, extra curricular lessons, or concert tickets.

2) Focus on blessing – not impressing – the recipient.

Sometimes it’s tempting to want the wow factor when someone opens a present. We want the recipient to be overjoyed with the gift we carefully select.

But, momentary excitement over something that will soon become clutter is not a real blessing. Instead, let’s focus on carefully choosing items that will be useful even after the tree has been taken down and the last of the cookies have been eaten from the platter.

3) Consider whether the present is in your budget.

If you’re about to swipe a credit card because your bank account is low, then stop immediately! Today’s gifts should not become tomorrow’s burden. Victoria from Snail Paced Transformations has a very inspiring article about how to have Christmas on a zero dollar budget.

For neighbors and friends, you can frugally spread clutter-free Christmas cheer by delivering a cookie tray or putting snowman soup in a cute mug from the Dollar Tree (free snowman soup printable here).

4) Be willing to return an item.

If you purchased a gift simply because you felt pressure to buy something, that’s a signal it may not be good timing or the right present. It’s okay to return something for a refund instead of gifting it.

For a few specific gift ideas, check out this article about 22 Themed Gifts for Everyone on Your List. Whether you’re making gift baskets, filling stockings, or still have no idea what to buy for someone on your list, there’s sure to be something in the article that will inspire you.

It’s not always easy to modify habits, but we can absolutely learn how to share memories, honor traditions, and enjoy the holidays while carefully choosing gifts that will be enjoyed long after the season has passed.

I’d love to hear: how do you minimize Gift Clutter? Is there anything you’d like to add to this list?

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What’s in Your Basket? {This Chocolate Cake Recipe is in Mine!}


I’ve always considered myself an introvert, but sitting on my back porch with a mix of close friends and near-strangers makes me reconsider. Deep, vulnerable parts of me are soothed. Laughter is often and loud. Occasional tears hush the chatter as we listen, nurturing the heart of the one who shares about her struggle.

As the last, lingering guest parts ways, I am recharged, picking up items and sweeping chocolate cake crumbs. Wondering. Musing about myself. Am I possibly part extrovert?

I still don’t know.

What I do know is this: During a Teaching from Rest book club meeting, we discussed our baskets that Sarah Mackenzie talked about in her book. She shared about the time Jesus fed the 5,000 (Mark 6:30-44). She also mentioned that Jesus didn’t perform the miracle with nothing. He had His disciples bring what they had, so they filled their baskets with a few meager fish and some loaves of bread and Jesus did the rest.

Sarah then encouraged readers to think about what’s in their own basket.

What’s in your basket? I asked my friends as the ceiling fan rustled the pages in our books. What are you naturally good at that you can bring to your homeschool?

Today, dear reader, I’d like to ask you the same questions. What’s in your basket? What things are you naturally good at that you enjoy doing? And how can you use your skills and interests to contribute to your home?

While you’re considering these things, I encourage you to whip up this moist chocolate cake in your kitchen. My friend Kelli gave this recipe to me when I was looking for a delicious and easy cake, and it is so good that I just have to share it with you!

Even if baking isn’t normally in your basket, this cake can be. And I promise that if you try it just one time, you will never return to a box chocolate cake again!

Print

Moist Chocolate Cake

This incredibly easy and moist chocolate cake recipe is perfect for everything from family dinners and birthday parties to potlucks and wedding showers.
Course Dessert
Cuisine American
Prep Time 5 minutes
Cook Time 30 minutes
Total Time 35 minutes
Servings 2 round cakes
Author Kelli and Davonne

Ingredients

  • 2 cups flour (all purpose or gluten free)
  • 2 cups sugar
  • 2 cups hot water
  • 1 cup baking cocoa
  • 2 tsp baking powder
  • 2 tsp baking soda
  • 2 eggs
  • 1/2 cup butter (regular or Earth Balance buttery spread)

Instructions

  1. Combine first 6 ingredients (flour through baking soda)

  2. Mix in eggs and butter

  3. Pour into 9x13 baking dish, 2 round cake pans, or 26 cupcake molds

  4. Bake at 350F until a toothpick inserted in the center of the cake comes out mostly clean or with a few moist crumbs attached (about 20 minutes for cupcakes and 30-35 minutes for cake).

Recipe Notes

I recommend frosting the cake or cupcakes with Wilton's Buttercream or Chocolate Buttercream frosting. The cake is so moist that it's also delicious simply topped with powdered sugar after it cools. You could also mix powdered sugar with a tiny bit of water to create a simple icing. Kelli likes to half the recipe and ice her 8" square cake with simple peanut butter frosting made by mixing together 1/2 cup powdered sugar, 1/4 cup peanut butter, and 3 tbsp milk.

I’d love to hear: what’s in your basket? Share something you’re naturally good at in the comments!

Show Love with Clean

“She also rises while it is yet night, and provides food for her household… She perceives that her merchandise is good, and her lamp does not go out by night.” (Proverbs 10:15, 18 NKJV)

I pause to absorb the timeless message. That woman had great self-confidence, to know the merchandise she was creating was good enough to sell.

I read on. “She is not afraid of snow for her household, for all her household is clothed in scarlet…”

I tilt my head, thinking. My kids still fit into last winter’s coats. I wonder if that counts as being ready for winter. I continue reading. “…Her clothing is fine linen and purple.”

Ohh, fine clothing! I just went to the mall and bought new jeans on clearance – I bet that counts! “She makes linen garments and sells them…”

Hmm, maybe the clearance jeans don’t count. I wonder if she was irritable from spending long hours sewing by herself late at night. “…She opens her mouth with wisdom, and on her tongue is the law of kindness.”

On her tongue is the law of kindness. I contemplate those words. She must have been tired, but yet she chose gentleness. How did she do it? My eyes focus in on the next verse. “She does not eat the bread of idleness.”

Excuses start rolling through my mind. Conviction begins rumbling in my gut. I want to close my Bible, to turn away from the uncomfortable. But this time, I make myself consider the words I’d just read.

I think of the 30 minutes I spend reading my favorite blogs before I roll out of bed most mornings, the 15 minutes I use browsing social media when I arrive home from work, and the 45 minute television show my husband and I regularly watch before we go to sleep.

None of these things are bad.

But then I think about everything I want to do. Declutter my house again. Publish the book I’ve written. Read to my kids more often.

Those little minutes are adding up.

I rapidly calculate the numbers, grasping for something measurable amidst the emotions swirling around my heart. Not counting in-between moments I spend throughout the day, I’m wasting at least 10.5 hours of time every single week. My mind whirls with the possibilities of what I could accomplish with that much free time.

If somebody told me they were going to gift me with 10.5 free hours each week, or 45 free hours every single month, what would I say I’d do with the time? Would I want to write another book? Take a warm bath every night? Exercise daily?

I know what I wouldn’t do. I wouldn’t say I was going to spend that time staring at my phone.

Sometimes we think we’re too busy. We don’t think we have time to keep a clean home or to linger over a great book with our kids. And yes, there are seasons of extreme busyness. But there is a very wise observation that says,

“If you really want to do something, you’ll find a way. If you don’t, you’ll find an excuse.” – Jim Rohn

My question today is this: Are we finding a way or are we seeking an excuse?

This year, let’s love our families well. Let’s stop playing the part of the martyr and start welcoming our loved ones’ interruptions – and their messes – with warm hugs and gentle words.

Here are a few simple ways to start:

When we see photos of roses, chocolate, and other romantic gestures popping up on social media, let’s choose to also intentionally offer love in less flowery, but longer-lasting, ways. We can pour ourselves into our homes and our families. We shouldn’t clean because we need something in return or to make ourselves feel valued.

Cleaning runs much deeper than that. We want to live a life of no regrets, a life that isn’t held back because of a chaotic home. We desire to create a clean, calm environment that our family members want to come home to each evening.

We don’t always know what life holds, but whenever something comes our way, whether good or bad, we want to be ready.

“Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her…” Proverbs 31:28

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Friend, I know that sometimes we’d love to create a clean environment but we aren’t sure where to start. So I want to share a fantastic series that’s going on right now. It’s all about How to Organize Your Life in 30 Days, and it’s written by authors who hope to encourage and inspire you as you work to create space in your own home for love, laughter, and warm memories.

The best part is there are no rules – you can join in anytime and do as few or as many of the challenges as you’d like! Go here for details.

And don’t forget that you can read Chaos to Clutter-Free or join the Tidy Up club on Facebook for year round cleaning encouragement.

How to organize your life in 30 days- Instagram

It’s Your Year to Shine {The House}

Panic seized my heart. Please, no, I thought. Not now. I just need a few more minutes.

But there it was again, taunting with a sing-songy voice:

Ding-Dong!

Desperately looking around, I rapidly crammed a few more things into a corner then lifted a shaky hand in attempt to smooth my hair. Embarrassment flushed through me as I opened the door.

Never again, I told myself, stepping aside to let them in. I will never again be this embarrassed of my home.

Clutter may feel like a normal part of life, but it always comes with a cost.

Clutter induces stress, drains our energy, steals our time, and can rob us of our joy.

But we don’t have to live that way.

This year, let’s be proactive instead of reactive. We no longer need to panic when the doorbell rings. We can stop spending hours searching for lost items. We will take control of our laundry mountains.

Because when we regularly cultivate a clean environment, we’re not only caring for our homes and ourselves, but we’re also telling our loved ones:

“I love you enough to create a calm space for you. I love you enough to gently teach you how to care for your own things. I love you so much that I’m going to keep trying, over and over again, for as long as it takes to learn this well.”

This is our year to shine {the home}. Not for one huge, exhausting day or event, but for the entire beautiful year. Because when we’re taking good care of our homes, we’re not only offering the gift of clean – we’re giving the gift of calm.

If You Need A Gentle Nudge…

I’d love for you to join me in the Chaos to Clutter-Free challenge that begins anew in the private Tidy Up Facebook group every January.

I must warn you though, this is no ordinary challenge.

Determined people band together for encouragement, motivation, and inspiration as we declutter every square inch of our homes together. It’s going to be tough. We’re going to sweat. We’re going to cry. We’re going to want to scream and shout and give up and forget about the whole thing.

But we’re committed to pushing through together.

And when we’re finished, we’re going to cry and shout and jump up and down again – this time not in frustration, but in victory, because we’ll know that we did it. We’ll know that we pushed through the frustration, discouragement, sickness and fatigue, we kept going, we refused to give up, and we made it.

It’s going to be the hardest thing many of us have ever willingly put ourselves through. But when we’re finished? It will be glorious.

Here’s How to Shine {Your House} with the Tidy Up Friends:

  1. Join the Tidy Up Club on Facebook – while this particular challenge is specific to the winter months, encouragement & motivation are fresh all year long!
  2. Leave a comment on this post, send me an email, or introduce yourself to your new Tidy Up Friends so we know that you’re joining in.
  3. Dust off or purchase your copy of Chaos to Clutter-Free.
  4. Clean your house! Bonus if you take before & after photos to share with your Tidy Up Friends!

ChaosToClutterFreeCoverkindle2

If You’re Fighting Discouragement

Please remember that our value is not found in the cleanliness (or lack there-of) of our homes. Our value isn’t in the stuff we have or the meals we prepare. We’re valuable because God loved us enough to give us life. We’re treasured because He loves us so much that He allowed His Son to go to the cross on our behalf. That, my friend, is the greatest hope and gift of all.

“How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How great is the sum of them! If I should count them, they would be more in number than the sand…” Psalm 139:17-18 (NKJV)

“But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8, (NKJV)

Do you believe you’re valuable enough to live in a clean home? Are you ready to shine? If not, what’s stopping you?